When it’s gone, it’s gone!
Hey bloggers!
Just me, checkin’ in with y’all. It’s been a wee while I know, had a lot on my mind lately with course work and such. Something that has been on my mind recently that does not relate to course work is this…when it’s gone, you’ve lost it.
Big yellow taxi…come on, sing along
“Don’t it always seem to go, that you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone, I paid paradise to put up a parking lot.”
How true is that? I can relate this to myself, and I’m sure thousands of people out there can do the same. As I’ve told you all before, when I ended things with my ex partner, I lost one of my best friends that day. And our friendship has never been the same since. That is something I have to live with, because it was me who ended it, and it was me who cut off all contacts.
I woke up this morning, and feel over a box of old photos. Some fun memories were brought back, as I searched through these photos in a hunt for some old embarrassing pictures of my parents. It was not long until my mission was accomplished. There were photos from when my parents were engaged, through to being part of a family with three children…my family.
In my hunt, I stumbled across some old holiday photos, and yes, you’ve guessed it…I found pictures of my ex and his family at the dinner table. “This is so crazy” I said to myself. It’s funny looking back now, because when these very pictures were taken, it was that summer that I realised I like this guy. I was reminded of the fun games we played that summer, from football, to volleyball and table tennis, and of course Uno. Who can forget that. I remember playing football with him and the lads, only the once though…the guys didn’t like female players. However, when we did play this one game together…he was the only guy to ever pass me the ball. I’ll never forget that.
During these crazy summers, I went through a hat phase. I’m embarrassed to say, but yes…I had loads of hats, all different shapes and colours. That summer he bought a hat that was the same style as mine, the same brand, but was a different colour. I think I actually stole it for a game of something (dangerous flirting I know)….and he actual said I could keep it. Ok ok ok…so there was flirting on both parts, I see that now.
We had a great friendship, we really did. I told him EVERYTHING!! There are not a lot of people out there who know everything about, but he did. We laughed, cried and made jokes, we argued and cuddled and went for walks together. We were close friends and then partners.
Part me didn’t realise that when I broke up with him, all of the above to gradually disappear, and never happen again. But the harsh reality is that I lost all of that, that fateful day. I still have my memories though…and I will carry them with me everywhere I go. Every time I see a Virgin train, I think of him. I used to get that train to go visit him. I bet some of you are thinking, “yeh, but how often do you see a Virgin train?”. Good question. I see them twice a day on my way to University…so that’s four times a week currently.
If you ever read this, my ex…I realise now what I lost when I said goodbye. I’m sorry it took that harsh break-up and two years of reflection, to show me what a great friendship we shared.
People, please try and appreciate those who are in your life right now. It’s a shame but the song is so true…you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone.
peace
girl in the single lane
Just me, checkin’ in with y’all. It’s been a wee while I know, had a lot on my mind lately with course work and such. Something that has been on my mind recently that does not relate to course work is this…when it’s gone, you’ve lost it.
Big yellow taxi…come on, sing along
“Don’t it always seem to go, that you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone, I paid paradise to put up a parking lot.”
How true is that? I can relate this to myself, and I’m sure thousands of people out there can do the same. As I’ve told you all before, when I ended things with my ex partner, I lost one of my best friends that day. And our friendship has never been the same since. That is something I have to live with, because it was me who ended it, and it was me who cut off all contacts.
I woke up this morning, and feel over a box of old photos. Some fun memories were brought back, as I searched through these photos in a hunt for some old embarrassing pictures of my parents. It was not long until my mission was accomplished. There were photos from when my parents were engaged, through to being part of a family with three children…my family.
In my hunt, I stumbled across some old holiday photos, and yes, you’ve guessed it…I found pictures of my ex and his family at the dinner table. “This is so crazy” I said to myself. It’s funny looking back now, because when these very pictures were taken, it was that summer that I realised I like this guy. I was reminded of the fun games we played that summer, from football, to volleyball and table tennis, and of course Uno. Who can forget that. I remember playing football with him and the lads, only the once though…the guys didn’t like female players. However, when we did play this one game together…he was the only guy to ever pass me the ball. I’ll never forget that.
During these crazy summers, I went through a hat phase. I’m embarrassed to say, but yes…I had loads of hats, all different shapes and colours. That summer he bought a hat that was the same style as mine, the same brand, but was a different colour. I think I actually stole it for a game of something (dangerous flirting I know)….and he actual said I could keep it. Ok ok ok…so there was flirting on both parts, I see that now.
We had a great friendship, we really did. I told him EVERYTHING!! There are not a lot of people out there who know everything about, but he did. We laughed, cried and made jokes, we argued and cuddled and went for walks together. We were close friends and then partners.
Part me didn’t realise that when I broke up with him, all of the above to gradually disappear, and never happen again. But the harsh reality is that I lost all of that, that fateful day. I still have my memories though…and I will carry them with me everywhere I go. Every time I see a Virgin train, I think of him. I used to get that train to go visit him. I bet some of you are thinking, “yeh, but how often do you see a Virgin train?”. Good question. I see them twice a day on my way to University…so that’s four times a week currently.
If you ever read this, my ex…I realise now what I lost when I said goodbye. I’m sorry it took that harsh break-up and two years of reflection, to show me what a great friendship we shared.
People, please try and appreciate those who are in your life right now. It’s a shame but the song is so true…you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone.
peace
girl in the single lane
posted by single and waiting @ 6:10 PM
4 Comments:
At 6:58 PM,
Portrait of Peter said…
I felt a sadness as I read you emotive story.
For I too have similar memories of an ex and the heart still has an emptiness - a piece of music, name of the uni, and it all comes flooding back again!!
And yet, as the song from Sting "Set them Free" - we must do just that.
We must walk the path of life and its continuing mystique - there will be joys and laughter and perhaps a tear of two - but that is what we must accept - for we gain knowledge, strength and above all affection for those we hold most dear - family and special friends and above all the church.
I hope it does not sound cruel - it saying "Welcome Back" - but your page had an emptiness - which only you could fill.
God Bless You.
At 6:25 PM,
smilnsigh said…
"but your page had an emptiness - which only you could fill."
Very insightful comment.
May I add a phrase? "And you will."
Because if your gut feeling was to break it off with this man, then it was correct. Hard or not...
But you will find what you need/want... I certainly hope so, anyway.
Mari-Nanci
At 1:36 PM,
Portrait of Peter said…
Please view some of the people's blogs who contribute to my blog page - it may enlighten your dreams and an awakening.
They come from the heart - as this comment equally so.
At 2:41 PM,
Anonymous said…
i think you mean
"Don't it always seem to go
That you don't know what you've got till it's gone?
They paved paradise and put up a parking lot." rather than paid, but i get point.... but i'm guessing you broke up with your ex for reason and that you are much better off without him in your life, so try not to think about the good time which makes you sad about what you've lost but consider what could have happened if you had stayed with him. Its unfortunate when relationships come to an end but you have to move on and don't dwell on it. Mourn it for a time - thats natural but you have to put him behind you and move on with your life. You are right when its gone its gone.... and he's gone
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